This week has been really hard. I just want to crawl into a cave and snuggle up to something soft and cozzy for at least several hours. I am so tired of being tired. I want to feel everything I need to feel....but it is like if it all happens at once I will die...so instead I am numb. I feel nothing. I feel kind of zombie-ish.
I have so many thoughts going through my mind about what happened to Peter. I wonder why people didn't see it coming. I wonder why we were not warned in a dream or something. I wonder if I wasn't listening when he was trying to get my attention. I don't blame anyone for what happened....I just wish I had answers so I could tame the hurricane of ideas in my head.
I quit my job after I found out. I really hated my job...and I kind of had it. I don't regret it at all...but I will miss the residents. I just hope I don't have to work at Subway again. I would feel so........like I was working at Subway. I would rather do anything in the world (that is probably not true).
I have been downloading music all evening on Jessica's computer. I hope she loves it....I sure do. I don't know what I would have done without Jessica this week. It feels like she is here at the Ross's for my benefit (sometimes I like to think that I AM that special)...
My brother moved. My best friend (besides Beck, of course) is gone until December...THEN he is gone until MAY!!! I miss him already. I love Elijah.
Hung out with Cody a few times this week. He is a fun time. I like having friends...it feels swell. I really wish I had my car.
I am going to go now, because I have bored myself with typing. At least now you have evidence of my emotional numbness. Not that you needed it....??????
Bye
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment